Human
by Gwenhwyfar1984
Summary: Thanks to Metatron's betrayal, Castiel is turned into a human. He does not take it well. Season 9 AU


Fandom Weekly community prompt: Stages of Grief with the bonus of a character singing.

Dreamwidth 15 Woes Aquarius table #6-Obsession

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**Denial**

Castiel sat at the table, his eyes closed. He knew that he should get up and go help the others. The Winchesters had found out about some vampires in—

Where was it?

He couldn't remember.

That was strange. He was an angel, and his memory was excellent.

Yet, for some reason his head hurt so badly.

He heard footsteps approach him. They stopped next to him, and he heard a sigh.

Meg.

That was wrong. The faint scent of sulfur, and her demonic energy should have alerted him to her presence long before she had reached him. Yet, he couldn't even sense her now.

"Here," she said, and he felt a nudge against his arm.

"Please, leave me alone," he said quietly. The words came out as a whisper because his mouth was so, so dry.

"You need this. Now," she countered. He felt something ice cold touch his skin.

Opening his eyes in surprise, he saw her holding out a bottle of water. It grabbed his attention, and all he could think about was opening it and taking a long drink.

"I don't need that," he said, tearing his gaze away to look at her.

"It's been two days, Cas. You need to drink something."

"I'm an angel—"

"No, you're not. Not anymore. Metatron took your grace. You're human now, and you need water."

He looked away from her, not believing her words.

Not wanting to believe her words.

"We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way. And believe me, the hard way will be much more fun for me than for you," she said.

Knowing that Meg was not exaggerating, and wanting to retain some dignity, Cas took the bottle and opened it. Feeling a strange ache in his chest, he lifted the bottle to his lips and poured some water into his mouth. It was icy, and cold, and delicious. Eagerly, despite himself, he drank several mouthfuls before Meg took the bottle from him.

**Anger**

"Leave me be!" Cas raged, storming down the hall from the dormitory to the library.

"Castiel, I swear to—" Meg started, following him.

"To who? You are a demon. A filthy, sinful, evil, abomination." He said, spinning to face her. He looked down at her, as he should. He was an angel. "You're existence is an insult to nature and everything my Father created. You should be smote on principle."

Meg stepped to him, leaning in and letting her chest touch his. "And who is going to do this smiting? Hmm? Your brothers and sisters are here on Earth, cast out. They're running around like the lost little sheep they are. And oh, how they hate you. You step foot outside this bunker and you're dead."

The grin on her face made him raise his hand and place it on her forehead. Nothing happened, and he felt more rage than he had ever felt before.

She laughed in his face, and he stepped away, angry at her, at himself, and mostly angry at the universe.

**Bargaining**

"What the—Cas, what is all this?" Dean demanded, seeing Cas' newest purchases lined up on a table.

Sam, who had taken Cas to get his items, merely shook his head and walked away.

"This is my salvation," Cas answered.

"Okay, where's Meg?"

"I am not a child. I do not need a babysitter," he replied. "I sent her away."

"What? What has gotten into you?"

"I have strayed far from the path of proper angel. So, by gathering together these various religious items, I will be spending most of my time praying. I also wish to do good. Then, perhaps, I will be worthy of regaining my grace and being an angel again. Is there anything I can do for you or Sam to make your lives easier?"

Dean stared at him for a few moments and then shook his head. "No, Cas. Just...take care of yourself."

Cas frowned and watched Dean walk away. He didn't understand. He was taking care of himself.

**Depression**

Cas curled up under the blankets. The door to his room opened, and he heard footsteps. A few moments later, someone sat heavily on the bed next to him. They didn't say anything, and slowly, he lowered the blankets enough to see who it was.

Meg.

"I kicked you out."

"Yet, I'm back. How's life?"

"Life is not good. I failed. Again." The pain and humiliation of it was squeezing his insides. "I tried everything I could to regain worthiness to be an angel. It was futile."

"You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself."

"I am not. I'm stating truths."

"Who decided you're not worthy? Last I heard, your Daddy ran away like the deadbeat he is. Is it that Metatron? He kicked all the angels off their clouds, not just you."

"He took my grace. They're still angels. I'm—"

"I was wrong. You're still an angel, Clarence. You might not have powers, but you'll always be a tree-topper."

**Acceptance**

"Are you sure about this?" he asked warily.

"Yes," Meg replied.

"I have never heard of—"

"Hey. Who's been human longer?"

He narrowed his eyes. "You were human over one thousand years ago. They did not have karaoke machines then."

Meg had made a list of 'Human Traditions' that she insisted Castiel had to participate in. "Trust me. Now, pick. And not anything Dean would recommend!"

He frowned and took the large list of song choices. "I don't know any of these, Meg."

"Right." She took the list and flipped through it. Pausing for a moment, she studied him. "Yep. I'll go tell them."

When it was his turn, he got up on the small stage. Meg was grinning at him from the table. He had the feeling she thought he would chicken out.

Instead, he lifted the microphone and began to sing.


End file.
